Understanding the Strengths of Black Fathers

Fathers and father figures are incredibly important to the healthy development of tweens and teens. Black fathers are deeply involved and engaged in their children’s lives. 

However, Black fathers in particular are often overlooked and undervalued. Societal and cultural narratives often minimize their strengths and reinforce stereotypes of absence. “We all know the pivotal role that Black fathers play in the development and well-being of their kids, but they face challenges with being effective in that role, changing stereotypes, and coping with their own experiences of racism and discrimination,” says Joel Austin, Founder and CEO of Daddy University, Inc. 

Thanks to a grant from PolicyLab, Austin partnered with researchers and experts at the Center for Parent and Teen Communication (CPTC) and Children’s Hospital of Philadelphia (CHOP) to help Black fathers face those challenges head-on. Alongside Austin, former CPTC Director Dr. Jillian Baker, CPTC’s Director of Community Partnerships, Jacques Louis, and CHOP pediatrician, Dr. Roy Wade, Jr., led focus groups and a survey with local fathers to gather feedback and insights on the resources Black fathers raising teens need today. The results are compiled in this toolkit, which offers tips, strategies, and guidance for fathers navigating experiences and conversations about mental health, racism and discrimination, cultural pride, and more. 

As Senior Communications Associate at CPTC, I had the opportunity to interview Austin, Louis, and Wade, Jr. about the program, the strengths of Black fathers, and the importance of role models in adolescence. Some edits have been made for brevity or clarity. 

Taylor Tropea: What are the strengths that fathers bring to the table, especially during the adolescent years?

Austin: One of the strengths that we’ve come across with Daddy University in the last 20 years is this sense of balance that fathers can provide to children. You and your partner have two different personalities, and children are the recipients of both. And with that balance comes comfort and purpose. As a child, you can understand your mother and father, and see where you get things from. It provides a sense of overall balance, self-acceptance, and self-esteem. Another important strength is a sense of safety and security.

TT: Explain why focus group sessions were important to the project and tell us some of the key takeaways.

Wade: One of the project’s particular strengths was what I like to call “community-informed perspective.” Oftentimes in research, we go to the library, read about things, look in journals, and talk amongst ourselves. And then we come out with ideas. That approach is flawed because it doesn’t take into account the perspectives of the individuals whom we wish to serve. So we took this approach of trying to understand this phenomenon through the lens of Black fathers. Starting there as the basis of our work is key. It captures their voice and perspectives. And that gives it great strength.

TT: We know that one of the most popular topics of discussion was the importance of role models for teens. How did you address it with parents in the community?

Austin: What we’re emphasizing now is being open, honest, and transparent with your role modeling. As a parent, it is okay to say that you failed at some things. I love the fact that we’re able to model some of our best qualities. But we also have to be honest with our kids and say, “Some of these qualities need improvement.” Role modeling also involves acknowledging that I, too, get disorganized. I’m not coming down on you. My desk at work looks just like your book bag. And that’s okay, but here’s a new system we’re both going to try. We can get a calendar together. We can work on some of this new software together. That’s a good role model.

TT: What are some of the benefits of role models that you’ve seen in teens?

Wade: One strong benefit of role modeling for teens is how you navigate situations in which things haven’t turned out perfectly. I grew up as an African American in the South and in the rich tradition of Martin Luther King and other civil rights leaders. As I moved through my education, I was, at times, paralyzed by it because these people were so idolized and held up so high. It was almost like they were perfect in every way. It’s important to show your kids that we’re not all perfect. We make mistakes in life. But how do you navigate those times when you make mistakes and keep moving forward, working hard, and excelling, and not internalize that? I think that’s one of the real strengths of role modeling for our teens. We’re not always perfect, but we have to keep going and strive to be the best we can be each day. Parents are really vital in showing teens how to do that.

Louis: When fathers talk about, for example, discrimination or an incident that happened that was really tough, teens can see and understand their resilience and strength. For us as parents and as Black fathers, it’s important to support that. Teens force you to really be honest. The story you told when they were eight might not work anymore. So you’re going to have to share a certain truth. For me, it makes our connection even stronger.

TT: What are some of the ways that role models can help build racial and ethnic pride, and why is that so important during adolescence?

Wade: Adolescence is this great period of opportunity where our young people are developing their own sense of identity and sense of themselves, and all these skills that they’re going to translate into being an independent adult. One of the threats to that development is experience or exposure to racial discrimination. I see role modeling as the way to communicate with adolescents. The way to educate a child on how to navigate these challenges and build racial pride is in the way you carry yourself, the way you speak to and support others, and who you elevate and rise up in your own life. I think that’s key. And then building within your kids a sense of their historical pride.

Louis: I’m a father of two sons, and they’re both at HBCUs, historically black colleges and universities. I had to understand the history of why they exist. So there will be a narrative that someone is lazy or incapable, and yet you have people literally fighting to read and write. Systems and environments that said the only way you can read or write is not with us. Yet there’s still a legacy of people fighting to reach the highest levels. So when Dr. Wade says he’s a pediatrician, it’s not just that he’s a pediatrician. He is literally the legacy. This has always been about changing the narrative about the absence of black fathers. Pride, to me, is really about legacy and letting our young people know that this light has been here and continues to be here.

TT: If a parent is looking to identify or introduce role models or mentors into their teens’ lives, where can they look, and what types of qualities should they look for?

Wade: They should start by looking in the mirror. No person is more central or impactful in their children’s lives than their parents. This is something I’m passionate about because I’m a general pediatrician. I work in West Philadelphia. I serve a mostly African American population. And sometimes I have parents who come in and see a Black pediatrician, and they want their sons to see the possibilities for themselves. But sometimes parents minimize the importance of their own role in their kids’ lives. I try to flip the narrative and tell them I can say some things to your child and try to encourage them, but the most powerful words and actions are going to come from what you do and say. Starting from that perspective is key.

Austin: As a parent or someone biologically connected to the teen, I would start by learning how to really listen to my teen to find out some of their needs. Sometimes you have to find someone who can speak your child’s language. Mentoring has always been a part of us. We’ve been surrounded by it.

TT: Why is it important for fathers to model the steps they take to build strong mental and emotional health, and what are some ways they can do that?

Wade: We are in a really unique and exciting time when traditional narratives about what it means to be a father are being broken down. It’s not enough to just pay the bills. It’s not enough to just show up at the games. Now, fathers are more nurturing. You are helping with school plays. You are helping pick out prom dresses. There are these great opportunities to be more impactful in our kids’ lives in a way that maybe my father couldn’t have been because he was holding on to a certain narrative about what it meant to be a father. 

Now we can show how to manage emotions, stress, and mental health. You can break down those traditional myths about what it means to be masculine. That it’s okay for a man to cry. That crying is a part of life. Then you can show kids how you get up after that and keep persevering and moving forward. You can show your softer side and be vulnerable with your kids in a way that teaches them that it’s not always about being physically strong. That strength can be measured by your ability to persevere and manage your emotions in a difficult situation. Fathers are pivotal for that because we can teach those skills, break down some of those narratives, and challenge those myths about masculinity and what it means to be strong.